Archive for June, 2010

Toy Story Thoughts

Dave and I went to see Toy Story 3 on Saturday…we loved it!  There should be advanced warning for parents (especially empty-nesters) to bring Kleenex!

As we left the theater, we marveled at the marriage of  high-tech animation, with a whimsical tender story of childhood. The movie took us back to an innocent age, and made us long for that innocence to be extended for children.

Playing. Pretending. Using their imagination with dolls and toys.

I lament the fact that adolescence is what has been extended. 

In todays culture, our 10-year-olds are being turned into teenagers, and our 25-year-olds are being given “extra innings” of the teen age experience. This movie was a reminder to me that as parents we need  to fight this extension of adolescence on both ends.  To the best of our ability, we should push back the onslaught of teen dressing and thinking for our young children, and do our best to expect grown children to grow up. I’m making it sound easy, and it is FAR from that. 

Some of you may be wondering how I can square these thoughts of innocence with my encouragement to speak to children about the basic facts about birth and conception;  but I believe if we present the beauty and wonder of God’s design, we are indeed protecting children from other messages about sex in the culture.

Protecting our young child’s childhood, while expecting our grown children to be responsible will perhaps mean that living the teen-life is a shorter lived thing instead of  “to infinity and beyond!”

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Cover-up words?

Many parents are a little uncomfortable using the precise medical vocabulary with their children. They also get anxious about their children using these words in public…nothing draws attention in a grocery store like a child saying the words penis or vagina out loud!

If you are one of those parents, then here is a compromise for you: give them some cover-up words.

Just like we cover up our private parts with clothes, underwear, and bathing suits when we are in public, it’s polite to cover up their names in public, too. So, although we want them to know the medical terms, and we want them to use those words correctly within the family and at home, manners may call on us to sometimes use the word “Privates” when we are outside of our home.

Does that help?

Talking about “covering up” is one of those easy summer conversations …. unless you are of the skinny dipping variety!

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Dress up shoes

The other day a parent was relaying a story to me about her six-year-old son.

They were having a casual conversation when he suddenly said, “Mom, I know about S-E-X”…and then he raised his little eyebrows and said, ” I heard it is really bad.”

She was stunned!

What to do?

Take a deep breath and gently ask him how he came to this new knowledge. Then use this open door to replace what he heard with age appropriate information along with your important family values.*(if you have no idea how to do this, you might want to check out my resources…or read this blog from the beginning). Just try not to run out of the room screaming.

A few days later, maybe share a thought about shoes.


Ask your child to go to your closet and bring back your dressy shoes. Are these shoes good or bad? They are your nicest shoes, so you wear them to church, or to weddings, or on special occasions. You take care of them, so they will stay nice. What would be BAD is if you used them when you were walking the dog on a rainy day…that would ruin them.

Help your child to begin to understand that good things can be used in wrong ways, and therefore become bad, even hurtful. They weren’t intended to be that way. It can become a sort of game for them to look for things that get used in the wrong way…like soap in eyes, or Cheerios in goes on and on.

This can lead to great conversations in the future as you build on this idea!

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