Archive for Vocabulary

A Christmas Story

Merry Christmas, and bless you loyal follower!

Walking around the house today, I had time to look at the various manger scenes we have collected through the years.

My children had their favorites, but when I was a little girl, we only had one nativity.

Placing the Christ Child and Mary and Joseph, and all of the animals and kings and shepherds in the manger was a special Christmas tradition. I wondered about the star, the angels, but especially about Mary and Joseph. Your children may be doing some wondering as well, so let’s think about what some of those questions might be and how you might answer them.

Children are so practical, that it may not be the spiritually rich questions that they are wondering about. At least not at first. With new words to consider like frankincense, and swaddling, and sore afraid, and…

“Mommy, what does virgin mean?”  Your daughter asks as she is arranging the nativity on the coffee table.

You, however, are focused on untangling the tree lights and can’t really hear her over the high volume of Elf in the background.

“VIRGIN MARY” she asks again, but in equal volume….”What does VIRGIN mean?”

“OH!” looking up, “MARY! Yes, she is called the Virgin Mary because she wasn’t married yet.”

After a pause, you start again.

“She had never been close to a man, like a wife and husband are.”

You wonder if it’s easier to untangle the lights or the words you are tossing out.

“Huh??”Her 6-year-old eyes are squinting.

You put down the tree lights, find the remote to turn down the volume, and cross your legs to sit on the floor next to her at the coffee table.

As you pick up the Virgin Mary, you tell her sweetly, “Mary was a young lady engaged to Joseph….that means that they were intending to get married, but were not yet married, so they did not live together or sleep together. She had kept herself pure for her husband, which meant that she had not shared her body with any man.  The Bible tells us all of this. God chose her to give birth to His son, Jesus. God sent an angel to tell Mary all about it, and at first Mary was a little scared, but more than anything she was honored to be Jesus’ mother, because she loved God.”

Now you pick up Joseph.

Actually you accidentally pick up a shepherd, but your daughter corrects you and hands you Joseph.

“Joseph loved Mary, but when he found out that Mary was pregnant with the baby Jesus, he could not understand how that could have happened. God had never done anything like this before, and Joseph was thinking that perhaps Mary had become pregnant by being with some other man. An angel from God came to Joseph and reassured him that indeed God had placed his Only Son in Mary’s womb and that they were to name the baby Jesus because He would save His people from their sins.”

“From that time on, Joseph took very good care of both Mary and the Christ Child that she was carrying. He was probably the first to see Jesus when He was born! He and Mary knew from the beginning that Jesus was fully God and fully man, and they were amazed!”

By this time she is reaching for the remote because this is now her favorite part of Elf.

But you look on in wonder…. again. And someday, she will, too!

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Summer Time Homework

Ahhh…it’s summer!

A change of seasons brings a change of schedules and routines. Maybe you can sleep a little later, maybe you have to get up earlier to beat the heat and make swimming lessons on time. But whatever the case, summer is usually a change for young children and their parents. If you have school age children, then it’s nice to know you can stop asking  them if they have any homework to do.

That question gets so old.

YOU, however, are not off the hook, and as your friend I may need to remind you of a few homework assignments that are due by Labor Day!

1. We’ll start with your writing assignment. Some of you have already turned yours in, but a few of you still need to write your “message”.  You need to answer  the question, “What do I want my children to know about sex if they are growing up in my family?” One sentence only. Memorize for future conversations with your children.

2. There will be a vocabulary quiz each Friday. Be sure you are using respectful words when you talk about bodies, and minus ten if you only use “wingy-wangy-words” for body parts. I’m sure you will all get A’s on this.

3.  Take your children to Farmer’s Market and find something you have never eaten before…give it a try. While you’re at it you can get extra credit for finding time to talk about the seeds of that fruit or vegggie, and if you actually plant the seeds and grow something in the back yard you can go to the head of the class. Make keen observations about the fact that there are seeds and eggs inside of all living things.

Don’t you love Field Trips? Good, because here’s  another one.

4.  Visit a family with a newborn baby (they will let you come if you bring them dinner!), then engage your child in a conversation about babies as you drive home. Topics can range from why we wash our hands before we touch babies to who the baby looks like, but you will get bonus points if you talk about birth or conception in any way. Remember, just the most basic biology and your values.

5.  Speaking of biology…you might want to check out a resource at www.maryflo.org. The book is Questions Kids Ask About Sex, and it will meet your Biology requirement for all the information you will need to answer those questions. My Simple Truths resources are also available on that website, and they will suite every learning style.

That just about does it, but  let’s review:

Your message, vocabulary, birth, reproduction, conception.  It’s going to be quite a summer!

Just don’t let the dog eat your homework.

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Their first impressions

This is the beginning. The beginning of YOU being the loving teacher to your child. Answering their questions, and guiding their values. How do YOU plan to answer those questions?

It’s always best to start with God. He made us. We are designed by Him and wonderfully made. Every child is a miracle – every conception and birth. So, start by answering their questions with, “Let me tell you how God has made a way for the baby to get out…” and that will help get them on a path of understanding that God has a plan and a purpose for all of His creation.

Let’s don’t forget to marvel at that, and to let our children be in awe of it as well! Don’t let the fear of future conversations keep you from the joy of answering their early and simple questions with a smile and simple biology. You can do this confidently if you have a plan. 

It is a thrill for me to share some ideas for making that plan with young families. Most of us need a little coaching when it comes to these conversations, and I”m looking forward to my events this fall and next spring! If you are coming, bring all of your questions! If you can’t come, but have questions, then please check out my resources, or send me a question through this blog.

The new school year is ripe with opportunities for conversations, and my next post will cover some of the things to look for in the new school year.

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Cover-up words?

Many parents are a little uncomfortable using the precise medical vocabulary with their children. They also get anxious about their children using these words in public…nothing draws attention in a grocery store like a child saying the words penis or vagina out loud!

If you are one of those parents, then here is a compromise for you: give them some cover-up words.

Just like we cover up our private parts with clothes, underwear, and bathing suits when we are in public, it’s polite to cover up their names in public, too. So, although we want them to know the medical terms, and we want them to use those words correctly within the family and at home, manners may call on us to sometimes use the word “Privates” when we are outside of our home.

Does that help?

Talking about “covering up” is one of those easy summer conversations …. unless you are of the skinny dipping variety!

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